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January 29, 2012

23rd 'Sameday' of the month

Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent.
Ambrose Bierce

     Monday's are awful.  And I think I have figured out why...
     Your mind and body has to go through the 5 stages of grief over and over every single Monday.

     First you go through Denial - Your alarm goes off but you refuse to believe that it's showing the correct time because it can't be, you just fkn laid down literally 30 seconds ago, so how can it be 4am already.  It can't.  So you just put a pillow in front of the alarm and pretend you never saw the damn time.
     Next comes Bargaining - You hit snooze repeatedly.  At least 17 times in a row.  If your real good you can do this without ever waking up at all.
     After that we get to Anger - Finally you just chuck the damn alarm clock at something hard and stationary preferably shattering it violently into 57 noiseless pieces.
     Then you hit the wall called Depression -Eventually you finally do manage to get to work and the depressing fluorescent lighting sucks your spirit right out of your soul instantly and all you can do is just hold your head in your hands and cry.
     Finally you achieve Acceptance - After 8 straight hours of crying you finally get to clock out and at last you can accept that it was in fact Monday after all. 
     Then it's off to the bar to watch Monday Night Football and drink until you can forget all about the fact that tomorrow is only Tuesday.
     You see I don't think that it's only Monday that sucks out of all the weekdays Monday just sucks the worst.  They all suck really, every single weekday blows except Friday and even Friday sucks until quitting time. 
     Hell, by the time you reach Wednesday its all just a blur really and the whole week just feels like one really long ass day.  That's why I think we should just scrap individually naming weekday's and just call them all "Sameday".  That way instead of feeling like you are repeating the same day over and over its just one really long ass day.  
     Hell, we might as well 'cuz I could swear I did this exact same shit yesterday.  Or was that earlier today?  Honestly it's all just a blur. 
     Is it Friday yet?

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