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September 28, 2012

Cigarette Prices in America Today

     This is a guest post I did for the Squire's Squadron blog a while back and I wanted to share it with you guys here.  Check out Squire Squadron too though, funny stuff.  Anyway here it is...

    What I'm gonna talk about while i'm here is how the man is screwing us extra hard once again.  These cigarettes are just too damn expensive today. 

     I mean come on, $5.00 a pack for Marlboro's?  Are you fkn kidding me? 

     Chris Rock once said that them's crack prices, and they really are.  He's totally right. 

     I mean think about it y'all, it's completly dispicable these prices for our smokes.  I man it's just awful. 

     It might be at least a solid number 6 on the all time list of great incidents of butt rape against us citizens of the United States of America ever occurring in time. 

     Of course number one being 9/11, but this cigarette price conspiracy is at least 6th of all time if not 5.  Who knows.  i'll have to make the list sometime..,

June 24, 2012

We're Moving!

We moved, Our new home is,

Laughing at Life, pt2

Come, now to laugh,

- Laughing at Life -

Wrong number calls past 3am,

     If your calling someone's house past 3am triple check your numbers before dialing, you can get a player messed up with a late night wrong number hang up call, my wife blacked both my eyes last night.
     Dial carefully, players playing here..,

June 23, 2012

LN news Video Update from Shawn


click below

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Pee Wee Herman, Paul Rueben's biggest Stroke of Genius

The word of the day is

I mean lets say you're Pee Wee Herman, and you are the biggest childrens show host in the world ever and getting all that money.  Your horny and just  sitting on a goldmine and you just lose it all for a quick pull in a porno theater..? 

I wouldn't have done that.  Paul had demons though.  Did you see his mug shots? 

I'm jerking off at home if Im Pee Wee.

He's stupid, but a good actor.  he was good in Blow.

June 22, 2012

Holding purses in the panty section, Adult curfews, and Regular tail..,

     Its a married thing, you wouldn't understand...

I enjoy being married, I love it actually, nmy wife is great.   But it has it's up's and downs.

     I do miss certain things about being single though too. 

Matter of fact, today's thing that I miss the most about being single is going to Strip Clubs.

I Love Strip Clubs, Im sorry y'all I do.  But, I can explain..,

Just hear me out, Im probably going somewhere with this...

     Ahh the titty bar, a magical place without rejection.  Where a dollar buys more than anywhere else and the watered down bourban cost $8.  It's a strange land.  A dollar or two can get 2 titties rubbed right in your face naked and close up at the stage but it $4 for a beer.  The value of a dollar is all upside down in this magical erotically lit masochistice playground.

Big plus of married life though is, while I could go to the strip club anytime I wanted too when I got home I made love too my hand and one time a ultimate cheeseburger from jack in the box.  Just kidding.

Not about the hand love, just the food sex.

The hand love part was true.

Not now though..,

No more titty bars for me but I'm getting laid tonight for sure.  My wife loves my weiner. 

I'm even getting better at love too, I think, Maybe?

I love my babies...That's for sure.


Pulled Pork, and other funny, and sexual sounding foods,

I first saw a sign advertising Pulled Pork for lunch here in Missouri on the cafeteria sign of a factory where I worked.

It read, "Hot Today for $2, Pulled Pork and Mashed Potatoes with Vegetable Medley" I thought at first 2 bucks wasn't bad for a Lunch Lady pull.  I swear I'm that stupid y'all.


Plus I'm a kid inside and out 100%, I mean, I still giggle just

 remembering damn lunch that sign,

 but then again, I'm very immature too.

That being said though, how about the word wieners?

Wiener is a very funny word to me.

Come on, Bun Size Foot Long Beef Wieners..,

Say that sh*t without smiling

Come on. Funny right? No?

I thought it was but you know me, I'm easily amused.